Face death of a loved one is like sailing for a while in an ocean of huge glaciers lonely. Little by little we waking, dawning back to life and the warmth of its sound to perceive that they are there, who accompany us in countless ways while they sleep in the middle of our heart.
However, We all know that in real life do not always have the platform or the time of the idyllic goodbyes. Because destiny, sometimes it is cruel and sharp, and likes to start on our side the most precious treasures: our loved ones. Hence we face most of our losses with a mixture of anger, grief and disbelief indefinable.
They say that after the death of someone close, more than living, "We survived", and we just move counter as if we were the protagonists of a strange vital outcome. Now well, this way of grieving is not the best. We are obliged to rebuild our lives, to make a beautiful tribute today who still lives in our hearts, that person who left a beautiful legacy, even today, It accompanies us in many ways.
Those who follow us do not deserve to lose
Sometimes we not hesitate to look up remembering those we have lost. However, They are not so far, It does not separate us all a heaven or a thick wall that divides the universe of living of those who are no longer. They, They inhabit a precious corner of our emotional brain, melted in the palace of our souls and that half of our heart that drives every beat.
The human being is made of memories, of experiences and emotional legacies that shape what we are, and that in turn inspire us and push us to move forward, although others are no longer with us. Julian Barnes said in his book "Loss levels"That after the death of his wife realized many things. The first is that the world is divided between those who have experienced the pain of the death of a loved one and those who do not.
This example was discovered through a friend, with very bad touch remarked that one advantage of having lost one's spouse is that it could now do whatever he wanted. That very badly laid Barnes, because he understood life as a place shared with his wife. In fact, if ever realized something just enjoyed it then explaining it to the love of his life.
The second lesson learned by Julian Barnes about death is that life is worth living despite the bloody empty, Despite the gap on the other side of the bed. Because say "no" to keep it moving again it is like losing the beloved, that person who lives in our being internalized and asks to be honored through happiness, Souvenir and new smiles.
They will always be with us
There are those who often comment that they "survive, means leaving everyday life behind our deceased loved ". Now well, In fact it is not left behind, but to rebuild our present to allow a more comprehensive future where memories and new experiences form a whole.
"The sea velvet dresses, and the deep sea pint of mourning "
There is a very interesting book on the subject entitled “Love never dies: How to Reconnect and Make Peace with the Deceased” (love never dies, how to reconnect and make peace with the deceased). At, Dr. Jamie Turndorf gives us a very useful strategy not only to cope with grief, if not then realize the ways in which we accompany every day our loved ones, those that have had to let go of force.
Connect emotionally with the memory to reduce daily pain
The strategy proposes Dr. Turndorf is simple and cathartic. It is based on an adequate internal dialogue where you can close any outstanding issues, where heal wounds and stay with that emotional legacy left to us by our loved one.
These would be some key.
- Prevents your mind go only to the last moments, Let your memory be wise and selective and nurtures every day of happy times, Smiles, the moments of complicity. That joy of yesterday will motivate you in this.
- He speaks inside with that person, Tell her you missing but accept, little by little, you are away because you understand that it's okay, he is happy. Explain that there are days when things cost you more, but then you take strength because you remember everything he taught you, all he offered you to make you a great person.
To conclude, this inner dialogue can serve as a great help, It's like creating private corners where everyday heal, which move forward knowing that Love, unlike the physical plane, never Dies. We are facing an eternal emotion that gives us comfort and an undying light. Let us wrap, Let us offer warm while We turn to smile again.