Many people in the current lifestyle people look new and increasingly intense experiences that what they do is anesthetize, pain away living as if we were automatons, seeking to give a brief meaning to our lives. The problem is that, while trying to protect us from suffering, we fall into what we want to avoid and we cause deeper pain: evasion. The path of evasion is the most dangerous, because adversity end up attacking us by surprise and we will not have the psychological tools to deal, and heal. The problem of evasion is that once inside that path, we can easily fall into hatred rejecting reality.
What can we teach Buddhist philosophy about hate?
1. Stop thinking in antagonistic terms
One of the most limiting belief has inculcated Western society is to think in terms of good or bad, positive negative. That's him principle of radicalization and rigidity of thought, besides being one of the bases of suffering.
In Buddhism, as well as most non-dual philosophical trends, everybody phenomena are a unit representing a continuum where the ends are not antagonistic. In fact, the yin and yang famous are two complementary forces that they need each other. What may seem a mere pun, actually has profound implications for our daily lives because we understand that all experiences enclose a positive and a negative part, we who give more importance to one or the other depending on our mental maps.
Like yin and yang, all experiences enclose a positive and a negative part.
This change in perspective will allow us open minded enough to understand that even seemingly negative experiences enclose an opportunity or, at least, a teaching that can become wiser or resilient people.
2. Be patient, Resist the urge to act
We usually associate patience passive and unglamorous. Proactivity qualities and compassion are much more popular. However, when times get tough we realize that, no patience, the other qualities can be quite fickle because a bright idea, without the patience to carry it out, It will stay in the drawer of frustrated projects.
Be patient involves not simply wait, but to be able to use that time wisely, to gather more information or grow as people, developing the tools we need to face the challenge. Practice patience is to notice what happens and, instead of reacting, bide his time to respond. We do not run or go back, but neither got stuck. This saves precious energy and respond with greater wisdom.
3. Responsibility leads back to you
For Buddhist philosophy, we are the most responsible for our lives Since, one way or another, all the decisions we have taken have led us to the point where we are. This Buddhist idea is equivalent to psychological concept "Internal locus of control"".
All things are interconnected and open to the flow of life
Of course, that does not mean to think that everything depends on us or that we should take responsibility for everything that happens, which would be irrational, but it helps us learn from the experiences and not make the same mistakes. You probably at first be overwhelming, but later it will generate an enormous sense of empowerment because we build awareness that we have the power to change our lives.
4. Free your ego
Although we see ourselves as isolated individuals, In fact all things are interconnected and open to the flow of life. However, our attachment to ego and the belief that it is immutable is one of the reasons why we suffer. In fact, the criticism hurt and angry precisely because we believe it is an attack on our ego. If we assume that we are constantly changing, we can understand that that criticism is part of the past and refers to an "I" that probably does not exist.
The mirror can serve as a metaphor to better understand this idea: a mirror reflects all objects that are placed in front, but these can not affected and continue to reflect other objects. Our problem is that we get confused and believe that we are the reflections that we are projecting in our minds. Release the ego of that delusion will allow us to learn more about each experience because we face them with a more detached attitude.
5. Practice acceptance
Many think that accepting is synonymous with passivity and resignation. In fact, accept is the first step of change. If we want to change something we do not like, we must first accept that there is a situation that bothers us or displeases. Unlike, deny reality involves staying stuck in a situation that causes us discomfort.
It proposes radical acceptance accept everything that happens, then consciously decide what we can do. There will be situations that we can change and others about which virtually have no control. Then, we must change our attitude. In the background, practice radical acceptance involves taking a mature attitude, understanding that there are things we do not like but still must deal with them.